150+ Funny Things To Say To A Narcissist

I can guess that you are dealing with narcissists which can be tough. They love to brag about themselves and act like they’re better than everyone else.

A Study published in NCBI Concludes that:

Humor plays a big role in how psychopathic and narcissistic personalities interact with others. By changing humor styles, we might be able to reduce some of these traits.

so after researching through many publications, we find that the way to handle them is with humor. Saying something funny can deflate their big egos without getting too mean.

For EG:

If a narcissist is going on and on about how great they are, you could say something like “Wow, you must be exhausted from being so amazing all the time!” in a joking tone. Poke a little fun at their constant self-promotion.

Or if they claim to be an expert on everything, you could smile and say “What’s it like to be so smart? I want to be just like you when I grow up!” That plays into their arrogance in a kidding way.

The key is using a light, playful tone rather than getting angry or frustrated. A funny comeback can cut through the narcissist’s selfish behavior better than endless arguing.

Of course, too many jokes might just inflate their egos more. But having a few good comebacks ready can be a relief when dealing with these dramatic people.

So we have come up with lots of funny sarcastic one-liners that you can say to a narcissist.

Funny things to say if they show narcissistic traits

we will list more than 150 funny one-liners to use against narcissistic people but first let’s discuss what to say when they show narcissistic traits and how to respond to them sarcastically so they don’t get offended.

Here are some more sarcastic lines to say to a narcissist exhibiting those traits:

When they brag about accomplishments

1. Wow, maybe they’ll name a Starbucks drink after you someday.

2. And I’m sure your Nobel Prize is just getting lost in the mail.

3. I had no idea I was in the presence of such greatness. Should I bow?

4. Keep celebrating those little victories. The big ones might be too much for you.

5. If only you put that much effort into being a decent human being.

When they seek compliments

1. Gee, you clean up nicely. For once.

2. Was that a new outfit or the same sad one you always wear?

3. I’d compliment you but I’m afraid I’d just be enabling your massive ego.

4. Let me guess, you want me to tell you how amazing you are again?

5. If you were actually impressive, you wouldn’t need to ask for compliments.

When they put others down:

1. Projecting your insecurities onto others again, I see.

2. I didn’t realize the Insult Olympics were in town.

3. Your motives are as tiny as your self-esteem, huh?

4. Maybe if you got off your high horse, you’d see we’re all just human.

5. Keep throwing stones from your glass house. Brilliant strategy.

When they make a big deal out of small problems

1. On a scale of 1 to 10, how dramatic are you feeling today?

2. I wish my life was as hard as yours seems to be.

3. First-world problems, am I right?

4. If you think that’s bad, you should hear about the time I stubbed my toe.

5. Don’t worry, I’m sure someone out there has it even harder than you.

6. I’m sorry, I can’t hear your complaints over the sound of real problems happening in the world.

7. Oh no, what a tragedy! How will you ever recover?”

8. If that’s a real problem, then I’m the Queen of England.

9. I didn’t realize you were such a delicate little flower.

10. Maybe if you spent less time complaining and more time-solving problems, you wouldn’t have so many ‘problems’.”

When they demand attention

1. I’m sorry, were you saying something important or just craving attention again?

2. They’re building a whole new wing on the museum in your honor.

3. If you listened as much as you spoke, you might actually be worth listening to.

4. Don’t worry, there’s enough attention leftover for the rest of us peasants.

5. I’ll give you attention as soon as egomania goes out of style.

6. If the world had a currency for talking, you’d be a billionaire! Shame it’s not worth much.

Here are more funnier lines :

• Humble people make the best braggarts.
• I’m jealous of how much you’ve accomplished…by talking about yourself.
• If I ignored you any more completely, I’d be an archaeologist.
• I didn’t realize they had arrived. I thought it was just a little light narcissism.
• Your ego is simply too big a target to miss.
• You must be a wonderful listener, with those two big ears and all.
• Do you ever wonder what life would be like if you had an ounce of self-awareness?
• How lucky I am to have someone so amazing talk AT me.
• I want to thank you personally for providing the hot air that keeps this room warm.
• I can’t wait to make your biography into a pop-up book, it seems more lifelike somehow.
• You’re not the center of the universe. Didn’t they teach you about Copernicus?

Funny Things To Say To A Narcissist Parent

Here are some funny and lighthearted things you could say to a narcissistic parent that gently poke fun without being too hurtful:

1. You certainly have a healthy sense of self-confidence.

2. I admire how sure you are of your abilities.

3. Your belief in yourself is quite impressive.

4. You really know how to promote your accomplishments well.

5. I can see why you’re proud of your achievements.

6. Your self-assuredness could inspire others.

7. You have a talent for keeping the spotlight.

8. Your confidence is an example for us all.

9. You’re not one to let your talents go unnoticed.

10. Your self-promotion skills are top-notch.

Funnier things to say to a narcissistic partner

Here are some funny, slightly snarky things you could say to a narcissistic romantic partner:

1. Enough about you, let’s talk about your favorite subject – you.

2. I’m sorry, I zoned out when you were talking about yourself again.

3. If you were any more self-absorbed, you’d be a black hole.

4. I can’t believe you managed to make my accomplishment about you.

5. You must be exhausted from thinking about yourself all day long.

6. Don’t worry, I still think about you too – myself, that is.

7. Please, grace us all with more stories showcasing your greatness.

8. I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.

9. Your ego is so bright, you could signal airplanes from space.

10. I’m in awe of your ability to make every conversation your personal spotlight.

The aim is to deliver these in a very lighthearted, teasing manner rather than coming across as cruel or angry. A bit of gentle mocking can be funny if said with the right smile and tone. But be cautious, as too much of this could legitimately hurt their feelings over time.

Here are a few resources related to Narcissits partners:

Am I Dating A Narcissist Quiz [Take Free Test]

How To Escape A Narcissistic Relationship?

Funny Things To Say To A Narcissist Coworker

Here are some funny, slightly snarky things you could say to a narcissistic coworker:

1. I’m sorry, I got distracted by your overwhelming humility.

2. For someone so impressed with themselves, your work could use a little more effort.

3. Your ego is even bigger than your latest powerpoint presentation.

4. I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.

5. Don’t worry, there’s no meeting too small for you to try and steal the spotlight.

6. I didn’t realize this was a competition to see who could be more self-obsessed.

7.  Well aren’t you just the celebration of the century.”

8. Your head might be turning into a black hole with how much it’s swelling up.

9. You managed to make a team accomplishment completely about your personal greatness.

10. I can barely get a word in with your incessant self-promotion.”

You can poke fun at their inflated ego and constant need for admiration, but in a more light-hearted, exaggerated way between colleagues. Use an amused, almost disbelieving tone rather than coming across as harsh or angry. And be cautious about taking it too far – mild teasing is one thing, but you don’t want to create hostility in the workplace.